The Greatest Song Ever Written

"She could steal but she could not rob"
John Lennon & Paul  McCartney

D Vautier


My kids once asked me what was the greatest song ever written.  This is like asking what is the greatest color or the greatest ice cream flavor, certainly not a question to be taken seriously because there is no answer.  But maybe there is an answer sort of so I began a process of elimination.  Who is the greatest singer or group?  That was easy--the Beatles, no argument.  And what was their best album?  Another easy one--Abby Road.  So Abbey Road must be the greatest album of all time.  Then came the really hard part.  What song on Abby Road is the greatest song?

The back side of the record contains 11 tracks, ten listed and one bonus track "Her Majesty."  It's hard to get 10 good quality tracks on one side of an LP so all the tracks have very small gaps between them.  It's difficult to separate these songs because the segues are seamless and there is just a fraction of time between songs.  Continuing discussion rages about which songs on the back form into what medleys.  Some consider the whole thing to be one big beautiful song but my choice goes like this.  The best song on the album came down to two songs, or more precisely it came down to two song medleys, the three song medley Mean Mr. Mustard/Polythene Pam/She came in Through the Bathroom Window which to my mind is an obvious medley, and the other song medley Golden Slumbers/Carry that Weight/The End.

So of these two songs which are both three song medleys, I initially selected the Golden medley probably for as many reasons as I would have selected the Mustard medley.  One reason was Mustard had slightly better lyrics but than Golden had better segues and that "oh look out" transition between Pam and Window is as magical as you can get.  But then it’s so confusing trying to compare two perfects because every time I listen I change my mind.

To me there is no such thing as an actual “song” Polythene Pam or She Came In Through the Bathroom Window or The End.  These are pieces of a medley that have to be together just as Beethoven's second of the 5th can't be considered alone.  Mean Mr. Mustard/Polythene Pam/She Came in Through the Bathroom Window are absolutely inseparable like the Blessed Trinity, and the other song group Golden works the same way.  So my conclusion is that Golden and Mustard are the greatest two songs ever written.

She's so good looking but
she looks like a man




Once there was a way to
get back home.



You're gonna carry that weight,